“As her soul was departing (for she died), she called his name Ben-oni; but his father called him Benjamin.”
Genesis 35:18
Dear members and friends,
Few verses in Scripture express the mystery of spiritual transformation as profoundly as this one. Rachel’s final breath gives birth to Benjamin. Her last words name him Ben-oni, “the son of my sorrow,” while Jacob immediately renames him Benjamin, “the son of the right hand.”
The two names describe the same event from two different perspectives. From a human perspective, regeneration often feels like Ben-oni. As we grow spiritually, we are asked to surrender familiar ways of thinking, long-held assumptions, and even spiritual identities that once served us well. Rachel represents the affection for internal truth—the love of learning, seeking, and understanding the things of God. Yet there comes a point when truth can no longer remain merely something we know. It must become the very life we live. That transition can feel like a death.
But the Lord sees what we cannot. He calls the child Benjamin, “the son of the right hand,” representing the truth that is born from goodness. The truths we once struggled to understand are no longer simply ideas; they become expressions of love. What began as knowledge becomes personality. What began as doctrine becomes life. Perhaps this is why Rachel could not remain after Benjamin’s birth. Her role had been fulfilled. The affection for inner truth had accomplished its purpose by leading to a state where truth and goodness are fully united. What appeared to be an ending was, in the Lord’s providence, the completion of regeneration.
There are seasons when our spiritual lives feel like Ben-oni—marked by sorrow, loss, or uncertainty. Yet faith invites us to trust that the Lord is already calling those same moments Benjamin. In His hands, our deepest sorrows become the birthplace of a life more fully united with His love.
My brothers and sisters in God, let us take a moment of prayer this week. Let us deeply reflect on our journey, which we call our life. Let us acknowledge the deeper truth of our life: Every struggle and sorrow we underwent is meant not to bring suffering to us, but to nurture our spiritual growth.
Blessings,
Rev. Junchol Lee